Welcome to the many adventures of the Cartwright family.

Friday, April 21, 2017

We've moved!

Big news!!  We've moved!  I have had a great time blogging here, but the time has come to upgrade a bit.  Team Cartwright can now be found at www.team-cartwright.com.

Update your bookmarks and start checking out the new site for all the recent posts.  Don't worry, all the old content moved too.  I know there are going to be some bumps in the road.  If there is a post you are looking for and can't find let me know and I will  help you out.

Thank you for your patience and thank you for being a part of the team.  I'm so excited about this new adventure!


-
-Kim

Thursday, April 13, 2017

7 Ways to Encourage Toddlers to Embrace their Natural Scientific Tendencies- Guest Post

Today is a Babywise Friendly Blog Network (BFBN) trade day!  I am over at Chronicles of a Babywise Mom today.  Twin naps.  Guys, they can be tough.  Getting one baby on a solid nap schedule is tough, two can be tougher.  I have outlined how I went about getting my girls on a solid nap schedule.  Trust me, all the efforts are worth it.

Today I have Katrina from Mama's Organized Chaos talking about one of my favorite things- kids and science!  You all know I think we need to be encouraging our little scientists.  Katrina is giving us some great tips about how to actually do that.

As always, be sure to check out all the BFBN ladies to see what they have to say!
-Kim





Why? Why? Why? Why?

This question probably sounds familiar if you have a young child! While it probably gets annoying at times to answer question after question, it is an amazing quality that children exhibit- curiosity! From birth, our babies are little scientists as they figure out how the world around them works. They may not know the word gravity yet, or what it means, but they test it's presence every day as they drop items on the floor, and even test jumping off of things themselves. Our babies don't know what adhesion, cohesion, and surface tension mean, but they certainly test the capabilities and properties of water as much as they can. They learn and they absorb so much knowledge through open play that allows them to explore their natural curiosities.

Why is the basic question of science, and our children are natural born scientists! Our children form hypotheses and test them without even knowing it! Our children are little observers, just as the best scientists are. I think it is so important to celebrate these natural tendencies, and encourage them to embrace these qualities. As parents this can be unknown territory, especially if you were not a fan of science. But, the reality, is that it is so easy to help our children embrace their natural scientific tendencies, and I bet you love science more than you realize (just maybe not that high school chemistry class) LOL!

As a scientist myself, I find it fascinating to watch as my toddler shows exceptional scientific qualities. I bet your little one exhibits these qualities, too! When I think about what it takes to be a good scientist, I come up with a handful of qualities. Does your toddler exhibit any of these?

- Notices details
- Enjoys making observations
- Is curious about the world around them and how things work
- Enjoys exploring
- Likes to be challenged
- Appreciates nature and loves being outside
- Attempts to solve problems

There are more qualities, of course, like being patient and determined and organized, but those things are for the adult scientists, and come with age.

I bet your child, if given the chance to show these qualities and behaviors, would exhibit at least 6 out of the 7 qualities mentioned, if not 7 of 7! The key, however, is allowing them to keep these natural tendencies of theirs, by encouraging the above behaviors. You don't have to love chemistry to help your child keep their scientific skills alive and thriving!

Here are 7 basic ways you can help your child embrace their natural scientific tendencies (without getting all pinteresty with science experiments):

1. Go outside and enjoy nature. Yes, you can go to the playground, but on the way there, take a walk and explore. Sit in the grass and watch the birds. Pick up rocks and sticks. Sit on the sidewalk and watch the ants crawling. Encourage free time outside that is exploration based.

2. Let your child get dirty. Allow them to interact with nature in an uninhibited way. Yes, supervise to make sure your 1.5 year old isn't eating rocks, but allow them the freedom to play in the mud and squash it between their fingers. Get your rain coats on and splash in the puddles. Children are learning so much when they have the freedom to get dirty! They might just find a worm, or a frog and start making observations! You never know what knowledge a little dirt will impart on your child!

3. Allow your child the freedom to solve their own problems. Try not to step in any time your child hits a roadblock. You can give suggestions and offer things to think about and to try, but don't just step in and solve the problem for them all the time. Let your child struggle a bit. The struggle of solving a problem can lead to amazing learning experiences, and your child will grow up knowing they are capable of figuring things out. I think this step is extra important in today's cell phone age where we have information at our hands in a moments notice. We need to start young and teach our children that they can't always look everything up. Sometimes they need to solve a problem on their own.

4. Encourage them to find answers to their questions. This ties right into the above idea of allowing our children to solve their own problems. When they ask us a question, it is easy to always answer it. Sometimes it's ok to ask them what they think the answer is, though! It is even better to give them a way to find the answer to their questions on their own. Help them break down the question by asking them questions that lead to the answer. For example, when my daughter asks "What is that noise?", I start by asking her what she thinks it is. If she doesn't know and says "Help please", I start asking her questions. I ask if it is inside or outside? Sometimes, after answering, this question is enough to get her to venture a guess, and most of the time she knows the answer! If she doesn't venture a guess, I "guess" and ask her to tell me if I'm right. Is it a bird? Is it a plane? At 2 she can often answer what it is right off the bat, and if not, she eliminates items with me as we determine what it is together.

5. Make observations and ask questions. As a parent it is important to model this behavior yourself. Talk with your child as you go about your daily life. Ask questions about the world, and make lots of observations. Try to be detailed. Make note of the big green frog, and talk about it! Talk about the spots on its back, and the sound it makes. So much more comes from that, as opposed to just saying "oh a frog" and being done with your observation. Note the details!

6. Provide independent play. Nothing fuels problem solving, exploration, and observations more than independent play. When you aren't right by your child's side, they are much more likely to attempt to solve their own problem, try things in different ways, look at things in a new light. It is not uncommon for children to default to their parents when they are around. They know that mom will come solve everything, so they don't bother to attempt. Pretend you are busy, or even better, establish a routine of independent play! Your child's ability to solve problems will sky rocket!

7. Allow creativity. Scientists think outside of the box. That's how problems get solved. But we need creative solutions in order to solve the creative problems of the world. So, while you teach your child to color in the lines, also show them that they can color outside the lines and even add their own drawings. Let them do things their way. Often times, you'll learn a little something from your child, and learning from our children is one of the many gifts they'll give us as parents!

Other Posts of Interest:

Let Your Toddler Get Dirty






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Katrina has a 2 year old daughter and blogs at Mama's Organized Chaos. She's a mama that breastfed, used cloth diapers, did sleep training, and loves Babywise!

Monday, April 10, 2017

No touching: Why I don't make my child hug

This post originally appeared as a guest post on Wiley Adventures in May 2016.  


 Every knows this scenario- A distant relative (or not so distant) comes to visit, and wants to give your little one a big hug and kiss.  The child in question says no and tries to run away.  Often we see the child getting hugged and kissed anyway.  But in real life what should we do?  For me- if my child doesn't want to hug or kiss you, he doesn't have to.  I know not everyone agrees with that, but I will not allow my child to be forced into hugging or kissing anyone.

Why?  It comes down to one basic thing: it is his body.  He has a right to choose who he shares that body and affection with.  It's hard to think beyond our perspective sometimes.  When we want to hug a child it's because we love them so much and want to share that with them.  It can be hard to see it from the child's perspective.  I think about when I visit my nieces and nephew.  I love those kids.  I have known them their whole lives.  I have changed their diapers. I get pictures and updates from my sister in law.  I know all their developments, big and little.  But to them, I am someone they only get to see a couple of times a year.  So while I feel like I know them really well, they may feel like I am a stranger, and not want to hug.  I know I don't want to hug strangers, so why should they?  I feel the same way with my son.  I know his relatives who live far away love him and have seen tons of pictures of him.  That doesn't mean that he has the same knowledge of them, and it doesn't mean that he is as eager for hugs.

I am trying to teach my kids to trust their instincts and stand up for themselves.  If they are uncomfortable with a situation, I want them to be able to step back and say no.  This is especially true when protecting their body is at stake.  I think it is very confusing to tell them they can say no to people touching them, but sometimes they have to just let themselves be hugged against their wills.  When you are a small child, this is very hard to understand!  And no, I don't at all think they have the emotional capacity to think of the other person's point of view.  Yes,  I will try to explain that great aunt whomever is safe and just wants to share the love she has for him in the form of a hug.  But it is going to take them time to reach that understanding.  I also try to think about what it is like when you are that little.  Someone way bigger and stronger than you wants to hug you, which basically is holding you against your will.  You can't fight back, you are too small.  That is scary!  I don't want my child feeling afraid of physical affection, and forcing it upon someone is no way to promote healthy touch between people.

I also don't try to guilt my child into hugging someone.  I don't mind trying a couple of times to suggest he give hugs.  But I do not think it is fair to tell a two year old that they are hurting a grown adult's feelings by not hugging.  The adult should be, well, the adult in the situation and accept that the child does not want to hug.  Sure, it stings a little.  No one like to be rejected.  But I feel that using this technique to get a hug is teaching the child that they should feel ashamed or guilty when they try to protect themselves.  That is not right.  They have to right to decide who touches them and how in these situations.  

Don't get me wrong, I insist my child acknowledge others.  As I wrote about here, it is good manners and important to speak with others.  High fives, fist bumps, hellos.  These are all fine to push a little.  As adults sometimes we have to shake hands with and greet people we don't really want to.  But rarely do we have to hug someone we truly don't want to.  And when we do (probably a similar situation as I led with, a distant relative with a penchant for big hugs) we have the emotional capacity to understand why we are doing this and why we can still say no to others touching us.

So no, my child might not hug you.  I will ask him if he is sure he doesn't want to, but at the end of the day it is his body and his decision.  I want him to know that his mother backs him up.  He is learning what his boundaries are for his personal space, and I support him in those decisions.  This might not be the popular position, and it might not be how other families feel.  But for me, it feels right.  


-Kim

Friday, April 7, 2017

Friday Family Update {April 7}

We have been busy around here!  Ben has been super in to helping me in the kitchen.  The girls hit a big shopping milestone.  And we have been getting outside to play every chance we can.  

Ben decided we needed to bake a cake a couple of weeks ago.  It doesn't take much to convince me to bake something yummy, so we went for it.  Ben was such a great helper!  He is getting pretty good at measuring, cracking eggs, and stirring up the batter.  My favorite part is how much he is learning.  His favorite part is licking the bowl when we are done.  I handle the oven part, but Ben likes to keep checking in on his pans.  This time he decided he wanted a dinosaur space cake.  I just love his creativity!  It challenges me a bit, but we found a way to make it happen.  A couple of toy dinosaurs and some marshmallow stars and we were in business!


Baking buddies!
The best part- licking the bowl.
He was so proud of his cake!  I love the pride in a job well done.  Dinosaur space cake!
While we were baking Sammy decided to take up the study of medicine.  I'm glad she has a career path in mind.

Dr. Sammy.  She puts the stethoscope around her neck herself!
Ali has been all about the books!  I have a couple little readers on my hands and I love it!


Ali loves to share her books!
 Ali and Sammy took a break from their studies for an important occasion- their first shoe shopping trip!  The ladies are standing and starting to take their first steps.  I can't wait for them to be able to play outside with us, and that means they need shoes.  I can honestly say I had way more fun with this than they did.  They enjoyed themselves, but they are still a bit too young to get how fun new shoes are.  I loved checking out all the cute styles!  I do have to keep our budget in mind, so I didn't go nuts.  Flip flops and super cute high tops for these girls.  Not fancy, but they can pull them off in any situation. This little outing has me so excited for all the future shopping expeditions the three of us will hopefully have!

Pretty girls with pretty shoes.  They did like looking at their feet!
Look at those standing babies in shoes!
Rocking the high tops. 
The girls got new shoes, and Ben got a haircut!  My kiddos are looking good.  I just love these pictures because Ben pretended to drink coffee right out of the carafe and said he was 'just like mommy.'  Now, I don't actually drink it from the pot, but I do have a strong love of coffee.  The kid knows me.
Ben's impression of me.  Sadly not too far off. 


Ben got to sit in the police car, and the sirens and lights really work!  He was so excited.  I kind of want to get my hair cut in a police car.  

Who wouldn't want to get their haircut in a police car?
It is already hot here.  I know a lot of people are still waiting for their warm weather to arrive.  I am not a big fan of heat.  I prefer to hide inside.  But, well, the kids need to get out and play.  This means we do a lot of water play!  Nothing beats the heat like getting soaking wet.  I can't wait til the girls can play in the water with us!  Ben adores playing outside, so we spend a lot of time this way.


This kid just loves water!

A cake, new shoes, a haircut, and water play.  What could be better?

-Kim

Tuesday, April 4, 2017

Stop Fearing Math and Science (A plea to parents to help their children embrace the STEM fields)

Recently I saw an article discussing new ways to attract young people back to science.  While I think this is awesome- we totally need to bring youth back to science- it made me think.  Why are we pushing them away in the first place?  If you will excuse me, I'm going to jump on my science and math soap box.



It all starts with the parents.  We all know we can't tell our kids we hate vegetables or that exercising is the worst and then expect them to willing partake in them.  We can't tell them reading is the worst and expect them to be eager to pick up a book.  So why do we think it is okay to talk about how much we hate or hated math and science?  It doesn't make sense.  We as parents are huge influences in our children's lives, whether we all think so or not.  So step one: Stop talking about how much you hate math and science!  Just stop.  I don't want to hear Oh, I don't want to lie to my kids. One, you don't have to lie, just keep some things to yourself.  Two, almost everyone filters the truth to be appropriate for their kids.  Do you really tell your kids everything in explicit detail all the time?  Do you tell them all about your childhood trouble making?  Do you tell them what you and your spouse did last night (wink wink, nudge nudge.)  No, you probably don't.  You make sure you are passing on information in an age appropriate way.  I'm not saying you have to tell your toddler you love chemistry when you don't.  Just don't tell them all the reasons you think it's the worst and still have nightmares about it.  You can talk to a teenager about why you didn't like science class.  Sure, that kind of open conversation is fine.  But you can't tell a four year old you hate math and never use it.  They just aren't going to get the difference.  So, no saying you hate these things.

Step two: Stop being afraid to not know something.  This is a tough one.  I think this is where a lot of hatred and fear of math and especially science can come from.  No one wants to feel like they are stupid or just plain not in the know.  I get that.  The thing is, science is all about embracing what we don't know.  It's kind of the whole point.  You look at something and think- I don't know how that works.  But I would like to.  And bam, suddenly you are doing science.  Or something close to it.  Kids are naturally so curious about the world around them.  They are questioning everything.  Tell them the truth if you don't know why the sky is blue.  Who cares if you don't know?  Your kids certainly don't.  They want to know if you can help them find out the answer.  You know the advantage you have as an adult?  You have to resources to find that answer.  We have this amazing thing called the internet.  Look it up with your child!  Go to the library and find a book.  Find a friend who might know the answer.  Heck, email me and I will help and look it up for you.  Science is about asking questions and the search for answers, not just the answer itself.  Show your child how to look for information.  It's the whole 'teach a man to fish thing.'  Show them how to find answers for themselves and they will go far.  Do not feel bad if you don't know something you think you should know.  I think it is natural to want to avoid looking foolish.  But not knowing some facts does not make you unintelligent.  I remember taking biology and learning all about the Krebs cycle.  I am pretty sure I aced that test.  Do I remember any of it now?  No.  Does that mean I am stupid?  Of course not.  It just means this is not working knowledge I need to get through my life.  Very few people remember every fact they ever learned.  There is also the chance you never learned the fact in the first place.  Again, if it is not something that you need to function from day to day, why feel bad?  It doesn't mean you are dumb because you didn't seek out an answer you didn't need.  Our children need to see us admit we don't know something, but are able to learn something new.

Along with admitting you don't know something is step three: Stop saying you don't need math or science in real life.  You do and you use them.  Every. Single. Day.  You use them.  Ever cut slices of a cake?  You are making equal pieces out of a whole.  Guess what?  Fractions!  Ever scale up or down a recipe?  Ratios.  Want to decide if a coupon for one product makes it cheaper than another?  Percentages.  The kitchen alone is huge for science.  We mix and combine and chemical processes are taking place.  Have a job and pay bills?  You are using addition and subtraction.  (Probably more subtraction than we would like.)  The point is you do need these skills every single day.  It would be very hard to get through life without them.  So maybe they aren't your favorite things, but they are necessary to survive.  You might not need quantum physics every day, but guess what, you do use gravity.  Ever use a ramp or pulley system to aid in moving something?  Simple machines-physics.  Mixing paints to do an art project?  Glue drying and holding something together?  Chemistry.  You can't escape science and math, so stop trying.  If we admit how much of our lives involve these things they will become less scary,  They are not an 'other' that needs to be placed in their own category far away from everything else.  They are everywhere.

Let's try to remember STEM can be fun.  Read Shakespeare out loud in a monotone even cadence.  Pretty boring.  See it performed- suddenly it is amazing!  A simple recitation of dates and events can get dry.  Talk to someone who lived it an hear their real story?  History is as alive as ever.  Same thing with science and math.  We don't have to make it hard for ourselves.  You don't have to give formal math lessons to your kids, just let the numbers be.  They are all around us.  Let your kids help you count out silverware as you set the table.  Talk about cutting things in half.  Let them hear you adding up numbers.  You don't need to be in a lab to do science.  Let them look at different leaves as they change colors.  Set up a ramp and roll cars down.  Take a bath and look at what sinks or floats.  Observe birds as the fly around.  Just pay attention to the world and let your kids play.

A lot of confusion and uncertainty would disappear if we all stopped being afraid of science and math.  It is just life, people.  Literally- your bodies are full of biological and chemical processes.  So parents, lets all work on this and maybe we won't turn as many kids away from the STEM fields in the first place.  To recap- stop saying you hate STEM.  You might, but you aren't helping your children by telling them this too much.  Keep your opinion to yourself.  Honestly, maybe if you rediscover these things with your kids you will like them more.  Aren't most things more interesting when we see how much our children enjoy them?  Admit you don't know things.  There aren't any tests here!  Who cares what you know or don't know?  STEM is all about not knowing and looking for answers.  The journey is as important as the finish line.  Seriously, we all want our kids to learn to be problem solvers.  See a problem, think of possible reasons why it is happening.  Think of ways to solve it.  Implement said solution to test it out.  Learn and either try again or move on.  Sounds a lot like the scientific method to me.  If your kids see you eager to learn they will be eager to learn.  If they see you question the world they will question it.  If they see you not afraid to make a mistake they won't be afraid to try.  You get to teach them how to find good sources and be their own judge of information.  (Smart in this day of alternative facts.)  Admit that STEM is everywhere.  You are not escaping it.  It is not just not part of your life.  It is your life.


I am not trying to offend anyone with this, even though I know it is kind of a rant.  I'm sorry if I did.  I just passionately feel that STEM is all around and a part of daily life.  It isn't just for an elite few who work on the super hard problems and cutting edge technology.  It is for everyone.  I want to do everything I can to help kids and adults embrace math and science.  So I am completely serious- if you come across a science or math question you can't answer for your kids email me at teamcartwrightblog@gmail.com.  I can't promise perfection, but I will do everything I can to at least point you in the right direction to find the answer.  And remember parents- it is about the process, not just the answer.

-Kim

Monday, April 3, 2017

Spring Cleaning- The 3 bottle system that cleans almost the whole house (with your kids!)



One of my least favorite parts of being a mom is all the cleaning up I have to do.  It is constant!  Three kids, two of them one year olds that feed themselves?  Yes, we have a lot of messes.  I want to make sure our house is a clean, but I like to spend as little time as possible cleaning.  This means I have consolidated my daily cleaning needs into just three cleansers.  Now, these aren't for deep scrubbing or specific jobs.  These are for the general surface cleaning we need to do every day.  But by having these three bottles handy I am able to keep the house looking good quickly.  I spend more time between deep cleans, because I don't let them mess build up.  I am also able to do all this for as little money as possible.  Clean and cheap, that's my goal.  Let's break down how it works.

The tools:
Squirt bottles- I get mine at the dollar store.  They are always available, so if one gets worn out it is easy to pick up another.  $1 each.
Rags- I use old wash cloths or towels cut into pieces.  I got some hand me down towels from Pat's grandma, but you can also pick up a couple at your dollar store.  $1 each.
Sponges- I get the simple six pack at the dollar store.  You can microwave them to kill bacteria and make them last longer.
Paper Towels- I know, these aren't environmentally friendly.  But they are pretty handy.  And if a job is really gross I like to be able to just throw them away.

The tools for my daily cleaning.
The cleansers:
Vinegar solution- One cup white vinegar to one cup water and scale up as you need to. Vinegar at Target is $2.99 for 128 oz.
Bleach solution- Two teaspoons to a gallon of water should make a basic cleanser for almost everything in the house.  Bleach is $2.99 for 121 oz.
Water- free!  This one will come in handy for your children to clean with you.
(These concentrations match what I got from the bottles of vinegar and bleach.  Always be careful when diluting your cleansers and be aware of the surface types you are using them on.  Test in a small patch if you aren't sure, or google it. I am not responsible for what you put on your surfaces. Store your bleach and vinegar in safe locations, especially the bleach.  It is not safe for kids.)

The Uses:
Bottle 1: Vinegar solution.  This is my first line of defense for just about everything.  It is a great cleaner, it is environmentally friendly, and it is safe for kids and pets.  I keep it on my counter and use it pretty frequently.  It works great in the kitchen and the bathroom.  It can be used on most walls and floors.  Seriously, I haven't found a place I can't use it.  I wipe down high chairs, baby toys, counters, everything.  I like keeping this bottle handy while I'm cooking to clean up any messes on the spot without worrying about food contamination. I can clean around the kids safely.  It is safe on my floors and walls.

Bottle 2: Bleach solution.  The bleach solution is for the big guys.  Toilets?  Bleach.  Someone has been sick?  We get the bleach.  I also use it in my shower.  The shower only standing stalls are great, but they don't dry out easily, making it easy for mold to form.  I use the bleach solution in the sinks and showers every so often to make sure it is really clean.  I also use it on my kitchen sink.  Of course you need to be aware of your surfaces when using bleach, and keep it away from your children and pets.  But it is the cheapest way to make sure a surface is really clean.

Bottle 3: Water.  This bottle goes to my helper.  Ben is at an age where he wants to help with everything.  He can use the vinegar solution without any real concern, but I prefer to err on the side of caution.  Plus giving him his own bottle means I can use the actual cleanser and not have to switch back and forth with him.  It saves some arguing and time.  If you are in to oils you can add some for scent, but water is enough for my son.

Safety and labeling:
An important thing to do when you have your own cleansers is to label.  Any good chemist will tell you need to label your solutions.  With kids in the house and homemade cleaners it is even more important.  I put clear easy to read labels on all my bottles, even the water.  I know what is in my bottles, but I want to make sure anyone who comes in contact with them knows.

Nothing fancy, but clear labels.
The actual cleaning solutions have different color tops from the water.  If the labels fall off I know which bottles have cleaning products in them.  The water bottle also has stickers, making it easier for my helper to identify which is his bottle.  This also makes it a bit more fun for him.  I can tell him to go get his bottle and he knows exactly which one I mean.  The bleach bottle has the frowny face and the big red Xs on them.  I am trying to teach my kids that they need to stay away from the frowny faces.  They can't read yet so these pictures send the message.  The big red Xs are kind of a universal symbol that something isn't safe about this bottle.
No doubt which one isn't for the kids.
The labeling is important if you ever have other people in the house.  It makes it pretty clear what is unsafe for children to have.  I also like to use the across the room test with my items.  I want to be able to tell from across the room if my children have gotten a hold of something and how dangerous it is.  If they get the vinegar I can tell from the lack of stickers and color of the sprayer.  Not great that they have it, but not the end of the world.  It is a much bigger deal if they get the bleach, and I want to be able to see that right away.  Of course I try to keep these supplies tucked away and safe.  But life is busy and I am human, things could get left out.  These labels are not an excuse to not be careful, but an additional level of safety.  Better safe than sorry.

Cleaning with kids: I try to get Ben involved with the daily tasks around the house.  (Ali and Sammy are still too little of course.)  Part of being a family is taking care of our home.  Any time I clean up the kitchen I encourage Ben to help.  He loves to grab his helper bottle and wipe down the table for me.  I try to get him involved with other jobs.  He can use his bottle to help me wipe up spills, clean baseboards, wipe down walls, and clean up the sink in the bathrooms.  Yes, I have to go back and touch it up sometimes.  But the important part is that he is learning to clean up after himself and others.  He is also so proud of himself for being able to help out!

Helper in action!
He's great at wiping down the table and loves having his own bottle.
Three bottles, two levels of cleaning, one big helper learning to take care of the house.  Again this is surface level cleaning, but I can whip these bottles out and handle just about any day to day mess my kids throw at me.  As a bonus I am teaching my kids to clean too.  Wins!

-Kim

Saturday, April 1, 2017

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March 2017 Book List

Time for March books!  Okay, it is technically April now.  Can I use that as my April fool's joke? Yeah... pretty terrible.  But missing out on a month of reading would be even worse.  (Too nerdy?  That one was too nerdy.)  Let's just get to it. (As always, this post contains affiliate links.  That doesn't mean you pay more, just that it helps me out if you purchase through these links.  All opinions are mine.)




This month I have a nonfiction behind the scenes of Miss America, a story of two sisters separated sadly and how that shapes them, a drama with a turn I did not see coming, and a space story that is more of a personal rebuilding.


Being Miss America: Behind the Rhinestone Curtain by Kate Shindle.  This is written by Miss America 1998.  It goes back and forth between the history of the pagent and her experiences with it.  The history parts were pretty interesting.  The pageant started as basically a publicity stunt to keep people vacationing in Atlantic City one more week at the end of summer.  But it has grown into so much more.  This book focuses mainly on the times that Miss America has changed over the years.  It may have started as a stunt, but it is part of Americana now.  Shindle discusses several Miss Americas who didn't fit the mold and changed the way the pageant was run.  I enjoyed learning more about it.  The chapters about the author's experiences were interesting too.  It is easy to think of Miss America being a bit flighty, or perhaps too conservative, but there is a lot that goes into the job.  Way more than just a nice body.  It's always interesting to get the behind the scenes story on what life is like for big name people.  And Miss America has a lot going on after she wins the crown.  I would recommend this book if you like learning about the history of American culture, and honestly about feminism.  It gives a different perspective, and I always like that.

The Sisters by Nancy Jensen.  We meet two sisters in the 1920s in the beginning of this one.  They live with their stepfather, who, well, doesn't behave well to the older daughter.  She devises a plan with her little sister's beau to get away and take the little sister.  Messages get crossed and the little sister never follows or even learns of the plan.  The rest of the book is about the next two generations of this split family.  I did enjoy this book in that I like reading generational books.  What I didn't like was that it was basically a bummer.  Yes, bad things happen to the women in this book.  Most of them don't seem to take a ton of responsibility for their own choices or action.  That always frustrates me.  Sometimes life throws you a lemon, you just have to make do.  It did encourage me to remember that we don't always have the full story in life.  We don't always know why someone said something or acted the way they did.  If we can get past our own hurt we might be able to make amends and gain back a relationship we would have otherwise lost.

Luckiest Girl Alive by Jessica Knoll.  I loved this one.  It actually got me.  I won't give away the twist, but I was sitting there reading and really felt a bam! What just happened?  I had to go back and reread it!  That rarely happens, so I loved it.  This book is about a woman named Ani.  She was bullied in high school after falling into and then getting ostracized from the cool crowd.  As an adult she still seems to be fighting to prove herself to these people from her past.  She has an old money fiance, a fancy job, and seems to have it all, as we think we should want.  Of course we all know we can't erase our past, no matter how much we want to.  It is a part of us, and those who love us need to be able to accept that.  I loved this book.  It would be a great one for a summer vacation- I didn't want to put it down.

Beacon 23 by Hugh Howey.  I picked up this one because the author wrote the book Wool.  Pat got me that for our last anniversary (traditional gift was wool) based solely on the title.  Fortunately it was really good, and this one was too.  It takes place in the future, where people travel through space a lot.  Because of this they have beacons set up at various locations to warn travelers of asteroid belts and the like.  These beacons are run by single operators, kind of like lighthouses in the past.  Our operator was a war hero from on ongoing war with an alien species.  What I liked about the book is that in large parts you have to decide if what is happening is real, or is it just some sort of hallucination or fantasy from a lonely man.  We get to go along with the operator as he tries to piece himself back together.  The comparison to keeping his beacon running really illustrates how we work through traumas.  It also touches on the questions of how does one specific life weigh against all of humanity?  Howey is a wonderful author, and I love his works.

These were some good ones!  I'd love to hear from other people who have read them!  What did you think?  And please don't think you have to agree with me- some of the best discussions are when we don't like the books!  Any suggestions for what to read next?  Comment and let me know!
-Kim

Friday, March 31, 2017

Spring Cleaning: How to keep twin baby clothes organized



Tiny baby clothes are so cute.  All the little onesies, tiny pants, itty bitty socks- adorable.  You know what isn't so adorable?  How frustrating it can be to keep all those tiny clothes organized as your baby grows!  Two babies means almost twice the number of clothes, and special sets that are meant to be worn together.   We were very fortunate to get a lot of hand me downs and gifts from friends and family that keep the girls in style.  But I need to stay on top of it!  I find the first year to two years the hardest to keep organized.  I hate when I find an outfit that is super cute but too small because I forgot we had it!  So here is how I keep our twins clothes organized.


First off, so general tips.  These work for all babies, not just twins.  I do utilize them with my girls.

Gone box, right in the closet.
1) The gone box.  Right from the start, put a giveaway box or bag in the bottom of the closet or somewhere in your kids room.  If you find something that no longer fits, put it right in that box.  Have something that you just honestly don't think you will dress your child in?  It goes in the box.  If you aren't 100% sure, put it in there anyway.  You can always go back in a get the item if you change your mind.  Chances are you will forget about it, which means you didn't need it anyway.  This can be useful as kids get older too.  My son had a pair of pajamas he adored, but they really didn't fit anymore.  He didn't want to give them up, but we have a bag in his closet to put in clothes to give to his little cousin.  Knowing that he was giving his favorite pajamas to his little cousin made him happy to part with them.  You can also just grab the bag when it is full and send it off to wherever you like to donate.  Easy.

Too big box, handy to check.
2) Keep the next size nearby.  By this I mean if you have space keep another bin with the next size up in the child's room.  If the next size is stored away in an attic or basement you are less likely to remember to look through it.  Anyone else go out and buy something only to find out you already had what you needed tucked away for later?  I have sadly done this several times.  Being able to take a quick peek has let me save a lot of money from buying something we already have, and it helps me from missing the window to wear things saved for later.



3) Review your inventory.  Go through your too big bin on a regular basis.  What regular means is up to you.  I used to go through every season change.  It let me pull out the items we would need as it got warmer or colder.  I would also get rid of anything in the current closet that would be outgrown before the weather changed back.  Now that we have basically one season- hot and hotter- I have to be a bit more on top of things.  I set aside an evening every couple of months and sort through clothes.  No, it isn't the most exciting way to spend a night.  But again, it is better than missing items my kids could have worn or wasting money on something we already have.

These tips have helped me stay on top of my son's clothes, and now my daughters.  Twin clothes can be a little more work though.  I like to coordinate the girls' clothes.  They don't usually match exactly, but they usually go together pretty well.  This is part personal preference part a crazy fear that one baby will be seen as the favorite because she has the 'cuter' outfit.  (I know, Pat says I'm crazy but I can't help it.)  We have gotten some outfits that are obviously meant to be worn together.  Others I put together out of what we have.  Double the little girl clothes can take over any storage space you have.  Fortunately I have a system in place that makes it pretty easy to keep it contained and still let me find what I am looking for.

1) Stick to basics.  This can be hard, because as I said baby clothes are so cute.  The easiest way to coordinate outfits is to focus on tops with neutral bottoms.  This leggings, jeggings, black pants, that sort of thing.  It is easy to grab two bottoms and they go with almost all the tops.  I do have some pants and top outfits for the girls, but that tends to just be more pieces to keep track of.  This way I can have fewer bottoms, which saves money.

Bins are awesome! This is about 90% of the girls clothes.
2) Utilize bins instead of hanging in the closet.  Hanging up tiny clothes can be very annoying.  Even with little hangers they fall a lot.  I keep most of the girls' clothing in bins, folded sideways so I can see what I am working with.  I find bins can store more, are easier to organize, and easier to sort through.  I can quickly grab all the girls clothes out of their room and organize them while they sleep.  I use two big bins and one little one.  The big bins have long sleeve and long pants in one, with short sleeve and shorts in the other.  The little bin is for pajamas.  It works really well.  And yes, these two bins hold almost 90% of my girls clothes.  (The other 10% is things like coats, hoodies, and specialty outfits.)  You really don't need that much for them!  I have found it is easier to dress them and really enjoy their cute clothes if I keep quantity down.  Less money, less mess, and more enjoyment of my favorite clothes?  Wins all around.

3) Store specialty items in the closet.  The things that aren't used as much like holiday outfits, special pairs of dresses, jerseys if you are a sport family, are perfect for the closet.  These items can get lost or forgotten about.  Having them hanging in the closet gives you a visual reminder, and they aren't lost in the daily wear.  This is also a good place for gifts you don't love from people you do.  You can remember it is there, get a picture when it fits, and not have to make excuses.

Every shirt is paired up.
One set, two girls dressed.
4) Store clothes in outfit pairs.  When I get new clothes for the girls, I immediately pair them up how I want the girls to wear them.  They stay together from that point out.  This way when I have to get the girls dressed in the morning I only have to choose one set, not two outfits.  It sounds little, but it saves a lot of time and decision making.





So you have your kids clothes' stored.  What do you do when you want to sort through them without a lot of hassle?  Every couple of months I go through the girls' current and next size up clothes, along with Ben's next size up clothes.  (Now that he is three he isn't growing quite as fast, so it's easier to keep with as we dress him every day.)  They are all in bins, which makes it easy to pull them into the living room.  I love my kids, but it is so much easier to do this sort of thing without their help.  One thing to remember to do is grab something of each child that currently fits well. I use that as my size check if I am unsure about an item.  I just use whatever the child wore that day.



I make this process as fun as I can. I make sure we are watching a show I enjoy, and I have something tasty to drink or eat.  Start with the current clothes.  Look at each item and ask yourself if you want your baby to keep wearing it.  Maybe it doesn't work with the current weather.  Maybe you just don't like it as much as you thought you did.  Be ruthless.  If you haven't dressed your child in it since the last clean out, you probably don't need it.  If you aren't sure about a size you have your known fit item right there to compare it to.  If it is too small, get rid of it.
Once I have gone through the current clothes I go through the next size up bin.  For twins that means making sure I have outfits I want to go together matched.  Not every twin mom cares about this, but it matters to me.  This is another times to be ruthless.  If you can't picture your kids wearing something, get rid of it!  This can be hard, especially with hand me downs.  But if you honestly don't think you will dress your child in something don't keep it cluttering up your child's clothes.

If you are like me, you might have a hard time getting rid of these sweet baby clothes.  This is where the husband comes in.  His job is to remind me that I am not throwing away pieces of my babies' childhoods by getting rid of old clothes.  It sounds silly, but sometimes I need the back up to remember they are just clothes.  Sure, I save a couple of things.  I have all the outfits my babies have worn home from the hospital.  But there will always be another favorite outfit, and there will always be more cute clothes.  If you need help staying strong- that's okay!  It also helps to think of more sweet babies making memories in these tiny clothes.  Someone will be happy to get what you no longer need.

This seems like a lot.  Fortunately after the first year and a half keeping up with your kids clothes gets easier.  They stop growing as fast, and they start to develop preferences.  As annoying as it can be that they no longer just wear whatever I want, it is one less decision I have to make when they pick out their own clothes.  I like to pick my battles, and usually it isn't worth arguing over clothing.  I love using the bin system, and as your children age and stop going through an entire wardrobe every three months it gets easier to use the traditional hang up method.  Then the bins can be freed up for other storage!

This is all kind of a lot for clothing for tiny humans.  I just hate when I either spend money on something we already have, or forgetting to dress my babies in something because it is saved for later.  It is only for a short time though.  Once kids stop growing quite as fast it is much easier to keep up with their clothes.

What suggestions do you have for organizing baby clothes?  Comment and let me know what works for you!

-Kim

And if you need some cute twin outfits to pair up, check out my review of My Twins Are Cuter!  Super cute clothes for twins and twin moms, and a promo code for 20% off your first purchase!  You can also head to My Twins Are Cuter to see all the designs yourself!

Wednesday, March 29, 2017

My Twins Are Cuter: The twin clothes you need to see (plus a promo code!)

(Disclosure: Products were received for free in exchange for this post.  All opinions are honest and my own.)

"Two for the price of one, huh?"  Any other twin mom hear that just about every time they are out?  (Among with other things.)  I usually just smile and nod when I hear this.  In my head I want to yell, "No!  Two for the price of two!"  Just because two babies were born at the same time does not mean you get out of paying for one of their needs.  The trade off is worth it- I have two sweet babies to love.  But it can make the budget a bit more challenging.



I am strict with myself when it comes to the girls' clothes. It can be so annoying.  Little girl clothes are so cute!  Oh, and having twins.  I totally want to take advantage of dressing them in whatever I want while they are still little and don't have a say in what they wear.  I will totally confess to enjoying dressing them alike.   I mean, I have twins, why not have some fun with it?  Let me tell you how excited I was to learn about My Twins Are Cuter.

My Twins Are Cuter is a site with clothing just for twins and twin moms!!  It was founded by Dawn, a twin mom (who else to better get what other twin moms are looking for?) after her twins noticed she liked to point out her twins were cuter.  What mom doesn't think that?  We all want our twins to be the cutest, and she is helping us out with it.  Let me tell you a few things I like about this site.  

1) Almost everything is sold in a set.  I know it sounds silly, but having to go back and order a second of something or find a coordinating outfit of another gender can be enough to make me say no.  One click and you have both items.  
2) There is a size chart!  It's a little thing, but Ali and Sammy have outfits that they currently wear sized 6 months through 18 months.  A whole year is represented there!  It is a bit ridiculous.  Having a size chart makes me feel like I am actually getting the right size.  
3) There are clothes for all gender combos!  Boy/boy, girl/boy, girl/girl.  They are all there.
4) The designs are simple, clean, and CUTE.  Sometimes you don't want the cheesy sayings, just something a little less overt.  All of the designs incorporate the number 2, but aren't shouting 'Twins!' at you.  This is awesome in case one of the kids spills on their outfit.  The other child can wear the top without looking silly if they aren't paired up with someone.  
5) All shipping in the US is $5.  Now, I normally am an Amazon Prime type of person.  But this is a reasonable amount.  The consistency makes it easier to budget for an plan ahead for future purchases!
6) The prices are decent.  These are specialty items, so it isn't like you are going to completely outfit your twins in them all the time.  But they are very accessible.  Most of the items are $25-$30 a set- so that is for two pieces.  That is really not bad!  And they aren't limited to a certain holiday or time of year to wear them.  I can see me getting a lot of use out of these.

My favorite part- My Twins Are Cuter is giving Team Cartwright readers a special discount code! Put TWINMOMBLOG into the coupon code spot in your cart to get 20% off your first order!  Yay!  

Dawn very generously sent the girls and me a couple of tops to try out.  Ali and Sammy got the Whimsical Whale onesies and I got the"I love my twins" distressed ink tee.  I love them all.  They came in a cute package.  I know that doesn't really matter if the product is no good, but it is so nice to get something fun and pretty in the mail.

Pretty mail!  Yay!
Even Ben wanted to see what we got!  
Love them!!!
The girls got their onesies in the 18 month size, so they are a little big.  (Ali and Sammy are 14 months now.) I prefer to get bigger so they have more time to wear them.  With it already warm around here, so they will get a lot of use out of these.  I love the cute design.  The onesies are 100% cotton, great for baby skin.  The girls looked so cute in them!  Of course getting pictures of my two little busy bees was, well, quite the challenge.  All I can say is that I tried.

Mommy has the camera out, scatter!
  I was able to get one at a time pictures.

Ali!!
Sammy!
 This is the best I could do of them together.
Sammy is less than thrilled, Ali just doesn't care.

I was a much easier model to work with, if I do say so myself.  I adore my shirt!  I think it is super cute, but not something too over the top I'll feel silly wearing it.  And I do love my twins!  The fit is great and it is nice and soft.  There are grandparent shirts too!  You know grandparents love to show off their grandbabies and talk about them.  These shirts are a great conversation starter!

I do love my twins!
My twins are so cute!
Check out this site.  It is great for twin moms, twin grandparents, and soon to be twin moms.  I think these clothes are prefect if you know someone pregnant with twins too!  My Twins Are Cuter.  Love these clothes!
-Kim




My Twins Are Cuter


And for everyone's amusement- some of the outtakes.

Sammy loved the bag the clothes came in.  She would not give it up!  She is tiny but fierce.
I tried sitting them at the wall.  They just tried to get the outlet.
We tried the couch.  Nope.
Someone always tries to escape! 
I put a blanket down to lure them.  It caught a big bro too.
A sweet moment...
... and it's over.
Modeling is exhausting.  So is trying to wrangle a couple of babies.

Happy Cartwright girls!